Saturday Morning Diary Poem

Thank you for the yoghurt-covered
strawberry pieces from Thorntons -
like little pearly whites but they taste really creamy

Thank you for the morning warmth and bowl of fruity
shredded wheat. Thanks for putting my ham
and pease pudding sandwich in the fridge for safe keeping
Thank you for the use of your computer to type these words
Thank-you for the little blue notebook and lilac biro
Thank you for the 97 bus from Bensham to the Gateshead Metro

Thank you to the universe for another wet Saturday
of course it had to be shit weather when I'm going to Whitby
Thank you whoever for publishing the celeb gossip colour glossy
it was riveting - fading pop stars on low carb diets
A-list actors and their collection of infants
How thin do you wish to be?
How big a brood do you really need?

And as we hurtle down the dual carriageway
I wonder what the rest of the day will bring
I could name-drop all over the shop
but what sort of a flop would the day be
without a little hilarity?
Rhetorical questions, divine interventions
Bladder spill preventions,
anal retentions

Hurtling down the runway of this brand new day
X9 bus sways in the gale force wind
maybe this scrawl should just be binned

...