Thirteen Ways to Avoid Normality

Thursday 22nd August 2013

Okay, so this is the day it finally happens. I’m on the bus to Newcastle. I was nervous earlier but I’m not going to beat myself up for using the book onstage tonight. Nine poems. I know three of them well, the rest are sketchy again. My retrieval is so poor it took me a decade to nail Hypomaniac – a fifty second rant – so fifteen minutes of stage time is taking the piss. I’ve read my set dozens of times, gone over poems in my head, packed up all the books, ready for people who reserved them. I have a few spares.

Had a good session at Mind this morning. Group enjoyed the work and I got to try out some of the more advanced process-compositions previously used at Waddington Street. The staff are pleased with progress and want me to continue in the autumn.

Bumpy ride into Ebchester despite being on one of the Red Kite buses. Ahead of schedule. Meeting Jenni at the Cumberland. Wish I could get out of my own headspace for a while. 6.04pm.

Friday 23rd August 2013

Good gig last night. But a little bit bereft now that all the books are sold/reserved. Me and Jenni went into town hoping to get breakfast at Goose but they stopped serving at eleven so we went to the Townhouse Café. Never used to bother with seated meals out – takeaways on the move sufficient – but it’s nice to sit and eat with Jenni.

At Grey’s Monument we talked to Karl and Ian for a while. Then Jenni went off to Sunderland for a meeting about JibbaJabba. I read an NME Trent Reznor interview at WH Smiths then looked at records and books in HMV and Waterstones.

Home by half five. Been at the computer all evening. Updates and messages to book buyers. Put Poetry Jam event up. Listened to Nick Cave and caught the BBC news. Another war on the cards.

I wanted to be at Mandy and Morbs book launch in Middlesbrough this evening but had work. 10.23pm.

Saturday 24th August 2013

Didn’t get much work done today. Too busy reading stuff online and watching films: Book of Blood and Trent Reznor interview. Did some post-book admin and scanned in some pages for the next print job. Quite tired. Good to have some online back and forth with Jenni this evening. Some good feedback elsewhere on the Lazy Sunday video clip I posted from my JibbaJabba set. Chicken pizza for supper. 11.40pm.

Sunday 25th August 2013

Been at the computer all day but haven’t managed to type up much work. Uploaded some poetry vids to YouTube and read a bunch of news articles. Need to read some proper books – not just online text. Bit of correspondence to break up the monotony. And some comfort eating. BBC News too depressing to tolerate. 10.20pm.

Monday 26th August 2013

Was supposed to be working but the sun was shining and I thought maybe some time out on the bike but then got to watching some videos and looking at pix of musicians and reading reviews and things and the day just slipped away. Pretty pathetic of me. But I feel the need to recharge for a while. The autumn is going to be pretty full-on.

Farthest I’ve been today is the shop for more pop and a chicken pizza. Have tried to stay off Facebook. Tried to read this afternoon but fell asleep. I watched my Jibba set and checked the length of intros, eye contact with audience, how much I rely on the page. I’m not in a good work mode but will have to pull myself out of the lethargy and get some editing done tomorrow.

Think I’m gonna have a bit of an early night and hopefully awake ready for work. Not a very good day, to be honest. 10.21pm.

Tuesday 27th August 2013

Another day of distractions – mainly the stupidity of people justifying and glorifying war. As I said in my online comments, I thought humans would have evolved beyond that by now but it’s obviously a ‘necessary and unavoidable part of humanity’. But really, I just don’t want to waste my breath on it.

Went out briefly for more food supplies. Finally got the Mind poems keyed in, printed out and ready for the group to have another crack at sequencing on Thursday. I’m running a bit late this evening. Wanted to be in bed by half ten.

Am quite looking forward to a workshop at Waddy in the morning. Packed up four Sunshine books that I’ve been holding in reserve. Not sure if people will be in to collect. Can’t be sure about any workshops regarding mental health.

Fish album due out in a week or so. Savages are playing Leeds and Glasgow. 10.42pm.

Wednesday 28th August 2013

Better day. Bit tired at start of workshop but more alert as the session opened up. Sold three books. Chuffed. Tonight a reserved Sunshine became available for general sale but I’ve offered it to someone eager to own a copy.

To be honest, I’m a bit burnt out after the months of focus towards getting the book printed and bound. I did no work tonight. Watched Clive Barker’s Midnight Meat Train – which is pretty gory. But it’s fiction, it’s fantasy – it’s not real people being gassed, bombed, persecuted. I’m a wee bit distracted by all the mess in Syria. 10.22pm.

Thursday 29th August 2013

En route to Gateshead via Ebchester to hook up with Jenni prior to our trip to Hull with Annie and Aidan for “Away With Words” tonight.

Had a relaxed two-hour session at Consett Mind going over the poems for our anthology before tucking into a box of fish and chips. Bit stuffed now.

Got the last Metro paper. Good to see letters page allowing the possibility that chemical attacks may have been the work of rebels or a ‘third party’ agitant hell-bent on getting the West involved in yet more conflict. Hope the truth, whatever it is, rings out loud very soon.

It’s good to get out of the house for a while. Looking forward to seeing some of the Hull poets reading/performing tonight. 1.20pm.

Friday 30th August 2013

BIG THANKS to Jim Higo and the Away With Words poets for having us down to Hull last night. Great to perform to a new audience and hear new voices. Special thanks to Aidan Clarke, Jenni Pascoe and Annie Moir for asking me to be part of the four-header NE poetry line-up. Special thanks to Aidan for driving us there and back. Hope to get to see Jim perform in the NE sometime.

Only six hours sleep last night. Checked Facebook updates after morning pages and read some articles about Britain’s decision not to enter Syrian conflict. Jenni slept on till almost eleven.

We went into town this afternoon for an all-day breakfast then onto Commercial Union House to meet up with Rowan McCabe to discuss One Hundred Thousand Poets for Change events taking place in Newcastle and Gateshead. Then a trawl through stationary shops for gel pens, envelopes, A5 punched pockets.

Also checked out Yankee Doodle Candy. Jenni bought me a root beer and a cherry-flavoured Dr Pepper for herself. We only managed half a can each before feeling the sugar rush and were pretty jittery afterwards. Had to sit down in Eldon Square.

After showing ourselves to be anything but adults for twenty minutes we went to Tesco for more food supplies. Checked out magazines – bike, craft, interior design, music – and lots more stationary before grabbing teacakes, jam tarts and cut price savoury pastries.

Master Chef and Edinburgh Fringe Festival tv special. “Where has the day gone?” asks Jenni. I’ve just told you. 9.25pm.

Saturday 31st August 2013

Left the house just after midday. Fish and chips in Gateshead then X70 to Consett. Checked out DVDs on the market. Jenni bought a mini musical keyboard. We got food supplies and taxi home. Jenni slept while I deleted emails. Watched 9/11 thing tonight. Saw Obama speech. Limited strikes? Or WWIII? Fell asleep for a while. Good for Jenni to be here a couple of days. 10.35pm.

Sunday 1st September 2013

Another lazy day besides knocking up a new morning pages book for the month. Mucked about on Facebook. Got 35 likes for witty Jenni comment. Watched Sean Penn movie “This Must Be the Place”. Poor performance, very much basing his Goth character on Edward Scissorhands. Had nice pizza, watched Flight 93 film and checked out 9/11 tower collapse footage. 10.58pm.

Monday 2nd September 2013

Took ages to get backlog of notes in shape. Got some Sunshine work done. Still waiting for people who reserved copies to make decisions on collection/payment. Got round to post office with Kevin Cadwallender’s copy. Had cowboy hash for tea and watched a bit of tv with Jenni. Went out for juice and jelly babies. Doc Marten afterwards then I fell asleep during the 9/11 thing. Lots of tv coverage as anniversary looms large. Really tired. More responses to book shouts. Hoping tomorrow is a lot more productive. We’ll see how it goes. 11.35pm.

Tuesday 3rd September 2013

Spent much of the morning typing. Listened to Various Failures by Swans and checked out the new NIN album Hesitation Marks. A lot more electronic than I’d like, but if it grows on me I’ll buy a hard copy.

Listened to Jarboe this afternoon whilst working to block out the sound of workmen sanding rebuilt walls over the road. Jenni downstairs at the laptop doing admin for JibbaJabba whilst listening to Queen live in Budapest and The Boomtown Rats. We’re going to see the latter in November.

Word on Facebook: there’s a new writers’ unplugged night called Willynillie hosted by Elaine Cusack starting in Chester-le-Street on Tuesday 9th September. Will be good to get along and support that.

Just finished packing up copies of Sunshine for delivery. Going to find something to watch on tv this evening then an early night. Workshop at Waddy tomorrow morning. Ok. 7.30pm.