Another End in Sight

Monday 19th December 2016

Loud knock at the door. One of the gifts I ordered from Amazon arrived this morning. Then an email from New College Durham with dates for courses at Waddy. Mine starts on Tuesday 17th January 2017. Same week as Ways with Words sessions in Newton Aycliffe. Ernie called in at lunchtime with a pair of shoes for Jenni. Let’s hope she doesn’t see this journal before Sunday. I’ve had a raging increase in the level of tinnitus in my right ear today. Really annoying. Sent out Xmas cards but haven’t done any gift wrapping or housework. Feel like I’m coming down with something. Going to bed early in hopes that sleep sets me up ready to try again tomorrow. 10.02 pm.

Tuesday 20th December 2016

Awake at four this morning. Tinnitus seems a bit better. Went into town to buy cards, some sweets for Cambian Appletree and a present for baby Lacey. Home to housework. Real slow. So much stuff to do. Hard to stay focussed on one area when having to shift stuff place to place. Fell asleep after hoovering the living room. Wrapped presents this evening but had to knock off due to a power cut that seemed to only affect Derby Crescent. Power restored. Done here. Sick as fuck. 11.47 pm.

Wednesday 21st December 2016

Today has been a long one. House still looks like a rubbish tip and needs to be sorted by Saturday. Session at Appletree went okay. Mainly just winter writing prompts. Didn’t want to push the festive season too much, but gave cards and tins of biscuits and chocolates out afterwards. Me and Jenni went shopping this evening – well, browsing really. Wrote stuff on the bus journey back. Went to Tesco in Consett. Checked out Leonard Cohen articles in music magazines. Lots of work to do before Mam and Ernie arrive tomorrow. 11.50 pm.

Found out the terrible news this evening about the untimely passing of Mark Potts. Mark was a lovely bloke, full of fun and enthusiasm for art and poetry and spoken word and people in general – someone who would just suddenly appear before you, as if beamed in from a positive source, keen to chat and have a laugh, whether at a gig, on the street in Newcastle during the day, sometimes at the central library. Always encouraging and upbeat. A brightly energized soul departing way too soon. Mark Potts, we’ll miss you.

Thursday 22nd December 2016

Well, everyone said 2016 has been a totally shit year – more so than 2012, which was the last time I tried to key in my full set of morning pages. Nine more days to get through. Cracked on and got the freezer defrosted, half of Jenni’s presents wrapped up and pages keyed in. Nine more days. Just nine more till it’s a big Fuck-Off to 2016! Hope next year is a lot better. 11.47 pm.

Friday 23rd December 2016

Pushed through the metawriting and self-indulgence that is morning pages, then wrote a paragraph about Bukowski whilst on the toilet. Never been good at composing criticism on touch screen straight to Facebook. I loved Bukowksi’s books in my early twenties, but he got away with a lot of shoddy stuff. Took me six hours door to door to get all the Xmas food shopping. Was supposed to be just buying dinner for Sunday but the weather forecast was bad so thought it best to be prepared. Tonight I wrapped up the last of Jen’s things and wrote out labels, listened to Billy Joel’s Greatest Hits then phoned Mam and Ernie. Jenni phoned me. She’s been shopping is wrapping too. My bad eating habits are kicking in. Mega BBQ chicken pizza, doughnuts, mint chocolates. Terrible lapses. Aiming to get the rest of the house tidy tomorrow. 11.47 pm.

Saturday 24th December 2016

Another busy day. Didn’t get the whole house tidy before Jenni arrived this afternoon. My bedroom is still a dump, but the rest is pretty okay. Delivered a few cards, talked to Mam and Ernie on the phone, listened to some Christmas music. Spent much of the afternoon sifting through old workshop handouts and clearing a decent space for Jenni’s luggage. She turned my living room lamp into a Christmas totem pole and tinselled the telly. 11.47 pm.

Sunday 25th December 2016

Merry Christmas to all. Lots of lovely things today. Took ages to open the massive array of gifts. Dvds, books, clothes, sweets, smellies and gadgets. Dinner was the usual extravagance and took forty-five minutes to eat. Jenni required two attempts a few hours apart. Spoke to Mam, Ernie, Mark and Diane on the phone. Half watched Maigret and music shows. Slept a bit then bed by half eleven where I’m scribbling this. 11.33 pm.

Monday 26th December 2016

Bit of a lie in. Then the aftermath of the Christmas kitchen. An hour of grease and hardened potato and stubborn gravy. Tried to key in some pages after lunch but fell asleep. Mam and Ernie rang this afternoon as well. It’s Mam’s birthday. Me and Jenni watched West Side Story and a documentary about it afterwards. Eaten all the Toffifee and cracked open the Liquorice Allsorts. Now watching the big Lego store opening in Leicester Square on TV. My bedroom is still a tip. I’m going to get some cherry pie or a fried egg on toast for supper. Jenni says ‘The Entire Universe’ musical is fucking mental. Noel Fielding taking the piss out of time and space on a big old pushbike. Finally got my pages keyed in for the day. 10.02 pm.

Tuesday 27th December 2016

Bit of a full-on day. Up around nine, keyed in morning pages. Got ready to go out with Jenni back to Bensham. Went solo down to Team Valley for a birthday present then met up with Jenni in Gateshead bus station at three for a ride over to the Galleries in Washington. Walked from there to her parents’ house. They fed us lots of Christmas cake, biscuits, crisps and chocolates; gave me a great pair of bigly black gloves and Jenni a new ultra warm hat. Bussed back to Bensham with pit stops in Asda at the Galleries and Tesco in Gateshead. I caught the half-ten 45 to Consett and here I am now scribbling the third version of today onto paper at home. Pleased we went out, pleased to get back. 11.54 pm.

Wednesday 28th December 2016

Not many people in Waddy today. Only three members of staff. Not many at Cambian Appletree either. Did session for just one resident plus support worker. Winter cut-ups and a pantoum. Was given two boxes of chocolates and a really nice card. I wanted to buy some new Doc Martens today but shop has half-day closing on Wednesdays. Had a look around Durham for an hour instead. Checked out mint black and white celebrity portraits by photographer Donna-Lisa Healy at the Gala Theatre; resisted the temptation to buy a grey leather bound Noto day per page 2017 diary at Paperchase. Buses are on Saturday service, so hung around later than intended – then missed connections meant I didn’t get back in the house until half six. Caught up on emails/Facebook then spoke to Diane, Mam and Ernie on the phone. Watched Queen videos, listened to the new Nine Inch Nails EP “Not the Actual Events” – which is okay except for one muffled piece of distorted nonsense at the end. Ate cheese on toast and a few chocolates. 11.52 pm.

Thursday 29th December 2016

Had fun battling with an overfull Henry vacuum cleaner bag this morning, almost inducing an asthma attack. Jessie Lynn McMains new zine “What Cannot Be Said…” arrived today. Looks a belter. Gonna read it tomorrow. Ate potato fritters and fried eggs for tea. Had nutella on crumpets and various other chocolate delicacies. Spent most of this afternoon and evening at the computer keying in work.  Did my 2016 round-up to be posted on Saturday or maybe tomorrow. It’s not as impressive as previous years but I’ve still done well over a hundred workshops. Aim to hit about 150 again in 2017. And at least fifty gigs. I need a book of prose out as well. Good to hear from Jenni tonight. It’s six degrees in here. The heating has been off since before tea. 11.28 pm.

Friday 30th December 2016

Penultimate morning pages keyed in then some other typing and copying up of stray notes. Jenni phoned from Consett just as I was getting ready to go there. So we played house tag. I got her bus ticket when she arrived at my place and I had an hour in Consett with free travel. Sorted end of year finances and bought some food for this evening. Took a tin opener to the Gru box and snaffled cash. This evening spent mainly lounging on the couch watching television. Ate crumbly Stollen, sweet mince pies and Liquorice Allsorts. Fell asleep during Dara O’Briain’s stand-up show came on. Surprisingly warm in Moorside. No big thermals necessary under the duvet. 11.46 pm.

Saturday 31st December 2016

Two-hundred-and-twenty-five thousand, four-hundred-and-one words from this year’s morning pages keyed in. 2016 review on Facebook and a day of looking through the posts and messages of friends. Watched ‘Last Shop Standing’ dvd documentary with Jenni about decline of independent uk record shops, featuring the likes of Paul Weller, Johnny Marr, Billy Bragg, DJs and numerous record shop owners. Bit miffed my TV wouldn’t play the Toyah Willcox programme on Really but chuffed to see Dawn French’s Thirty Million Minutes spoken word show later on. My year is almost done. Cheers! 11.11 pm.

STUFF I DID IN TWENTY SIXTEEN

Twenty-nine gigs – including appearances  at Stanley Civic Hall, JibbaJabba, King Ink, The Stanza, Alaphabetti Soup, Centre of Britain Slam, Never Mind the Ramones 3, Babble Gum, Mostly Spoken and The Literary Salon. It was also quite a novelty to read my Goose Carvery poem in The Goose on Percy Street, Newcastle – cheers to Ira Lightman for letting me on the mic at the launch event for his GOOSE pamphlet; and fantastic to do a set at Jess Green’s gig in Pop Recs Ltd.

BIGLY THANKS to all who came to Poetry Jam in Durham – some absolutely fantastic people read and performed at Waddington Street Centre this year and there will be more in 2017.

I delivered over 110 writing workshops for the likes of Colour your Life (NHS Arts on Prescription), Cambian Appletree, Derwentside Mind, New College Durham and Waddington Street Centre – plus Writing Marathons at Broadacre House and bookmaking workshops with Rowan McCabe and East Durham Artists Network. Thanks to all who read and commented on my ‘Scribbles from the Brink of Inertia’ blog throughout the year. I also turned out over a thousand morning pages and typed up extracts exceeding a total of two-hundred-and-twenty-five-thousand words – surely enough to at least make a decent pamphlet or two – plus a few free verse poems and monologues along the way.

I tried my damnedest to stay fit by hitting the cycle paths and trails on my mountain bikes. I bought a second longboard – a ‘Lush Pinnacle’ from Vandem Longboard Shop – but still can’t slide it to a stop yet. A couple of minor injures – sprained wrist whilst riding and sprained ankle whilst walking, but otherwise got through this year pretty much in one piece. Music-wise, I saw Toyah Willcox play a ‘Proud, Loud and Electric’ set at Longlands Club in Middlesbrough, after which I slept on a cardboard mattress outside the bus station; I took another nostalgia trip to see The Mission headline at Whitby Gothic Weekend in November on the night me and Jenni nearly got blown into the north sea; and in December I finally got to see gloomy POP legends of my teenage years, The Cure, who were amazing at Wembley Arena.

My poetry collection ‘Laughter to Split Glass’ is rescheduled for publication by Red Squirrel Press next April – mega thanks to Sheila Wakefield for that. The ‘ANOMALIES 1989-2014’ handmade hardback I’ve been working on SINCE 2015 is yet to reach completion.

MANY THANKS to all the people who kept me on track this year – writers, performers, promoters, venues, audiences; employers, workshop participants; family and friends – and of course my partner in life and rhyme, Little Miss Purple herself, Jenni Pascoe. All the best for 2017.