Formophobia, Frustration, Forgetfulness, Fun and Other Follies

Wednesday 4th September 2014

Was supposed to be doing the garden this afternoon. Had a bit of a migraine. Got a download of Fish’s new album “A Feast of Consequences”. The deluxe hard copy with 100 page book was due out this week but it’s been delayed.

Jenni is here. I have been trying to work but am too tired. Tried to watch Whitechapel but couldn’t get into it. Had a decent session at Waddy today. Sold three books. We have Poetry Jam tomorrow. Will be a good one, I reckon. 10.00pm.

Thursday 5th September 2013

Morning pages by seven then frantically searching bags, pockets, shelves, floor for rechargeable batteries. Pocket camcorder on limited power so only able to film short snippets of tonight’s Poetry Jam for picture stills to go on Facebook tomorrow.

People tell me to live in the moment. A lot of the time it’s just a mad panic to tick off all the things required to reach the next deadline. Right now I’m on an old Go North East red double decker in Leadgate on my way to Durham – similar to the bus that broken down in Delves Lane yesterday. Wrists aching a bit from doing the garden. Surprised the mower hasn’t blown up yet. 5.34pm.

Absolutely tremendous Poetry Jam tonight. Three top quality guests – Andy Humphrey, Pauline Plummer and Tom Kelly – and loads of excellent open floor readings/performances. Probably one of the best we've had at Waddington Street Centre. Huge Thanks to everyone who came and made it such a special event. And everyone who shared info on Facebook. Thanks to Waddy for a great venue - on which newcomers always comment - and Fergus for setting the room and driving me home afterwards. More great guests next month. 11.20pm.

Friday 6th September 2013

Don’t know whether it’s just the rain but I’m really aggravated and pissed off today. Don’t suppose watching/reading news reports on Syria has helped. Watched a documentary on Hiroshima as well. Tonight I watched The Runaways starring Dakota Fanning and Kristin Stewart and have been listening to Joan Jett. Today is a junk food day. Crisps, biscuits, dilute pop with lemonade. And cheesy rock music. Think I’ll have an early night. Lots of good feedback on Poetry Jam. Maybe I’m just on the comedown. Don’t know why I’m fucked off. World War Three or the rain. 10.10pm.

Saturday 7th September 2013

Better morning. Sent out two copies of Sunshine recorded delivery, bought a load of food and came home to check on the emails. Tried prepping for autumn writing sessions but struggling. According to Terry Brooks, author of Story Engineering, I am a pantser – someone who writes by the seat of his pants… Off to Jenni’s this evening, suitcase loaded full of laundry plus snacks for our lazy Sunday. Hopefully in Gateshead by quarter past nine. 8.32pm.

Sunday 8th September 2013

Read a bit of work prep and research in bed then checked emails. Talked to Jenni about problems with fiction then had lunch. Had a lie down for a while then listened to BBC Hyde Park concert. Stayed at Jenni’s till nine. Very lazy day. 11.19pm.

Monday 9th September 2013

Took till lunchtime to get through domestic chores before doing any proper work. Have managed to select all my session material for one ten-week course. Will do another tomorrow. Packed up copy of Sunshine for James Oates. Thanks to Katie Metcalfe for interview in Big Eyes magazine. 11.33pm.

Tuesday 10th September 2013

Good night at WillyNillie spoken word in Chester-le-Street. Asa, Jenni, Elaine Cusack, Ken Creen, Jules Clare, Jane Burn, Jean Laws and others. Really good poems. But I’m a little tired. Had FOUR attempts at Wired and fucked it up every time. I’m on 78 back to Consett. Got Confessions of a New York Taxi Driver book by a guy called Gene Salomon. A memoir, very engaging. Up early in the morning for a Waddy session. Hope I feel a bit better by then. 10.07pm.

Wednesday 11th September

First Bovril of autumn burns my foul tongue. If the powers that be could hear the vitriol and smell the venom issued today they’d tell me my services are no longer required. It’s been one of those days. If people would say what they mean and do what they say we’d all be able to navigate through life a lot fucking easier. I was recently told that I don’t suffer fools gladly. I’m not the brightest penny by any imaginative stretch but fuck’s sake some people in positions of power – so-called intelligent humans – just boil my piss. Spewed my innards in the name clarity and truth today already so I won’t reiterate. Suffice to say I’ll catch up on my own writing tomorrow then spend the afternoon with Jenni. 10.56pm.

Thursday 12th September 2013

Pleased to get work done last night. Had a nice walk around Newcastle today. Checked out music papers and writing mags. Met up with Sheila Wakefield at Lit & Phil. We checked out an exhibition of handmade books. We had to put on white gloves to handle them.

Just been to Barter Books in Alnwick. Me, Jenni and Sheila. Saw Ann Porro working there, she gave me the name of an author I might like: Daniil Kharms. Had a good browse through the poetry books. Jenni found a very early Paul Summers pamphlet. I bought it.

Sheila very kindly took us to Alnwick Playhouse café for tea afterwards. Steak pie and salad. We are now at Bailiffgate Museum. Degna Stone is here. Tony Williams. Ann Porro.We are looking forward to the gig. 7.55pm.

Friday 13th September 2013

HUGE THANKS to Sheila Wakefield of Red Squirrel Press for treating me and Jenni Pascoe to a day out in Alnwick yesterday. Had a great time at Barter Books - thanks to poet Ann Porro, who works there, for her help and recommendations. Good to see her performing at Bailiffgate Museum last night - along with Tony Williams, Jenni and excellent headliner Degna Stone. Nice to be asked to read a couple of pieces myself, despite having only just done a feature set there in August. Great to hear new voices and see some of the exhibits as well. Second Thursday on the month - if you can get to Alnwick it's well worth checking out this intimate unplugged spoken word / acoustic music night. Keep it going!

Enjoyed reading 140195 by Paul Summers on the bus back from Gateshead this morning. I already have the work in his ‘Selected’ from Smokestack but it was great to get the slim pamphlet of poems and rants published in 1995 by the Echo Room press. Got some food supplies in Consett. Lots of cakes. Found some Bonners lentil and bacon soup in Barry's for 35p a tin. Not the gourmet cuisine that is Baxters but still very nice.

A Rare Treat

Tonight he shall peel back the rind from his pinkies and scrape the black nasties from the back of each sharp curve because it delights him so. Only on horizontal Mondays does he allow himself such luxuries – along with re-runs of Porridge and something grotesque from the mind of a vile pulp horror expert. In his head he is a monster softened by the sweet smiles of strangers in supermarkets, but really he is merely a little bit of a misery who torments his colleagues with disastrous episodes from his self-imposed exile behind mountains of dead crystal boxes, filled with sharp animals that shatter at the edge of even the sanest boredom. Tonight he shall talk to the kettle as it sings its hellish songs to the sweating vinyl pasted to the walls, all the flowers peeling, all the confines of symmetry fading into the diseased brickwork.

LATER: I can see why Ann Porro would recommend the writings of Daniil Kharms, a Russian author who died of starvation in prison in 1942. "A Rare Treat" was inspired by his vignettes online this afternoon. Hoping in due course to get his book "Today I Wrote Nothing".

Baked potato and scrambled egg for tea. Wrote to Mandy Maxwell. She was good at Middlesbrough Pride last night – obviously I was in Alnwick but I watched her segment of Jules Clare's video when I got home this afternoon. Wrote to Speedy, Matt and Kate about their copies of So Much for the Sunshine. Soon as the final reserved copies are collected I’ll be arranging an ebay auction for number fifty of fifty.

Currently having an Attila the Stockbroker night whilst typing. It’s been a while since I saw him play. Hope he comes back up north again soon.. Have started in on the Bovril again -so it must be autumn. Think it’s time for another. 9.31pm.