"Ok, Show's Over - Move Along Now, Nothing To See Here"

Monday 9th December 2013

Mini-link to Consett. Pale blue interior, paler blue bars. Pristine. Smells like a shoe shop. And it’s really warm. In fact too warm. Even for December. Off to Jen’s for an hour before the big dash to Newcastle for the overnight Megabus to London. I have been in a foul mood most of the day. Just sick of being rushed. Sick of trying to cram in too much. Residual lesson plan hassles via email. Cut my hand rinsing out a Rogan josh tin. Fucked up the stitching on a handmade book THREE times. But hey, I got my clothes sorted. I can remember the running order of my twenty minute set and only need paper for a couple of the poems. Spoke to Mam and Ernie this morning. They said gift vouchers would be best for Christmas. Feeling rather wrecked now. Which is just as well coz I need to sleep big style on the bus or I’ll be dead tomorrow. That’s why I chose an easy ‘best of’ set. Forgot to do an invoice for the gig. 9.10pm.

Tuesday 10th December 2013

We got to London about eight o’clock this morning. Rush hour underground quite terrifying despite the hilarious announcer over the tannoy who sounded like a dub poet or rasta giving assurances that we’re all lovely people and Santa and Rudolf will be helping us on our way very shortly. It was good to get away from the sardine tin and over to Covent Garden. Spent some time in the park in unusually mild December weather. Then over to the Poetry Café on Betterton Street. Both of us knackered after little sleep. Jenni put her set together for tonight’s gig and I had a run through mine for time check. Then we went over to Camden.. Jenni checked out trilbies and purple bags. I want some chunky boots, Jenni wants suede doc martens. Found some grinders boots that I like and a pair of New Rocks very similar to the Madfish that I’m wearing. Didn't buy any. We are now in the South Bank Centre Poetry Library. I can hear Sinead O’Connor soundchecking in the Royal Festival Hall next door. Have just checked out small press mags and some rare Simon Armitage pamphlets that would cost a fortune. Now we’re off to the winter festival outside. 4.20pm.

Wednesday 11th December 2013

We got back to Gateshead around seven this morning. Jenni had only slept about two and a half hours since Monday and desperately wanted to get to bed. I slept till about once o’clock, did some morning pages with a run down of our London gig then logged onto facebook. It’s a good place for people to network and a place for some to make lots of enemies. So much bad mouthing in certain quarters. I don’t want to get involved. Jenni is still asleep. I’m eating peanut butter on toast, apple strudel biscuits and fruitcake to keep me going. Read some lists of ten books that have stayed with people. Ten Books that have stayed with me, more in the physical sense than in my crap memory:

 

1. Killing for Company by Brian Masters
2. The Roominghouse Madrigals by Charles Bukowski
3. Cemetery Nights by Stephen Dobyns
4. The Sign of Saturn by Sharon Olds
5. Exquisite Corpse by Poppy Z Brite
6. The Hellbound Heart by Clive Barker
7. The Book of Disquiet by Fernando Pessoa
8.The Consumer by Michael R Gira
9. Misery by Stephen King
10. Body Bag by Henry Rollins

Made a few changes to my original list and put it up on Facebook. Have written a letter to Leisureworks and am confident about the continuity of Talking Pen in 2014. 4.30pm

Thursday 12th December 2013

Fatigue making me extra irritable of late. Kids whingeing, people coughing their guts up on the bus, mobile phoners, dickheads with their iPods too loud. And the Metro paper full of the decline of western civilisation. I’m on a bus to Newcastle. It’s a furnace. I’m exceptionally tired and could have done with a few more hours in bed. Did a bit of book work and admin this morning. Raced round like a blue-arsed fly this afternoon. A meal with Sheila and Jenni at the Goose then a ride up to Alnwick. Jenni is the headline act at Poetry Night. The gig is in a church instead of the museum. Jen hopes she won’t turn to dust upon entering the building. I’m going to be hard pushed to come up with anything decent tonight. Might read some prose. Or a couple of winter poems. Hands hurting lots today. Old biketrial damage. I watched the Bike Party 2 vid online today. Martyn Ashton still in hospital 101 days after back injury, the vid only features a few minutes of his riding – the rest is done by Chris Akrigg and Danny McAskell. I hope to get back to some form of biking next year. We’ll see… 4.32pm.

Friday 13th December 2013

Gig in Alnwick was great last night. Enjoyed it more than London. Left Jen’s place at seven this morning. Was responding to her Facebook message back home by nine. Finally got the hardback book completed for an Xmas gift. Would’ve been done in a single afternoon if I didn’t have places to be. This evening will be my tenth night out in a fortnight. And there’s another three gigs before I’m based back at Cellar Twelve… This evening I’m off to Stockton to see Blood Brothers aka The Mission at the Georgian Theatre. Chuffed to be seeing the band in a tiny venue. Far better than an O2 Academy. Only two hundred tickets available. Got my ear plugs. I don’t do rock gigs without them these days… Chuffed to see Rob Auton is bringing his Sky Show to the Cumberland next February. And Bailiffgate is having a big gig on 13th. And Sheila tells me Ian MacMillan is at the Lit and Phil the same week… My right hand doesn’t like biros now. I need rollerball gel pens all the time. I am running late. Unshaven. Done no deliveries of cards or gifts. It’ll be Monday or Tuesday now. Bus to Durham is mercifully quiet. 5.30pm.

 Saturday 14th December 2013

Overslept as I didn’t get back from Blood Brothers aka The Mission till 20 past two this morning. Fucking awesome gig. Me and Jenni had a quick get ready then out to Newcastle to meet up with Dominic Berry, Kirsten Luckins, Dave Viney and AJ McKenna. We then went over to West Denton and were joined by Aidan Clarke and Mandy Maxwell with Claudia for street poetry outside Morrisons. Did three group sets. Good to meet Dave, hear new work. Tonight after a food expedition me and Jenni watched 100 Greatest Toys and now top ten film psychopaths. 10.10pm.

Sunday 15th December 2013

Nice lie in till almost midday. Scrolled through Facebook. Thanks to people who posted Mission vids from Stockton online. Jenni cooked us pizza for lunch then we headed into town. Thanks to Kirsten and all the Scratch poets for a lovely afternoon of fun and games. Nice food. Particularly the curry from Claire, gingerbread from Julie and blueberry muffins from Rowan. Thanks to Elaine and Claire and Ken and Sky and everyone else who chatted in the pub afterwards and said lovely things. Pleased to have the cuddles with Jenni. Pleased to be coming to the end of the gig run. Pleased to be home. Ok.  11.11pm.

Monday 16th December 2013

I’m writing this on the bus in case I don’t get time back home before midnight. Seem to spend my whole life chasing the clock. Was up at nine this morning. But didn’t actually get out of bed proper till quarter to eleven as I spent over an hour and a half on morning pages and set prep for tonight. How can a four minute reading take so long to prep? Seven poems – one from each collection in rapid succession… I wrapped up first Xmas present today. Didn’t leave the house till twenty to two this afternoon. Spent ages selecting cards and presents for colleagues, doing bank transactions, avoiding undesirables. Two hours in Consett. Didn’t get to Waddy till half four. Most of the staff in a trustees meeting so I just photocopied my CRB check and put it on Ali’s desk, wrote out some cards, dropped off sweets and biscuits, had a tin of lentil soup then left. Lost a hat en route to Newcastle. Bought another for £1.29 then walked down to the Lit and Phil. Good gig. We only had four minutes each and the emphasis on time did tend to overshadow content a bit, but a great set of readings including a lot of people I’d not seen before. I pulled off my seven poems in four minutes. Event raised two hundred and fifty quid for Philippines. Went for a drink with Jenni and Sheila afterwards in the Centurian. Then had pizza/pie and chips. On the bus to Consett now. Will see Jenni Thursday for JibbaJabba. Must do some shopping before Xmas. Cutting it fine. OK. 10.34pm.

Tuesday 17th December 2013

Lethargic. After the run of gigs I’m finding it hard to maintain and focus on chores. Spent a lot of time going over notes, listened to The Brightest Light album by The Mission, tidied up the front room a little. Sickened myself with all the typing and copying up. A bit of a cough coming on. Really want to rest for a while but must get the house in shape. Place still such a mess. 10.47pm.