Fighting It

Monday 4th March 2019

Jesus! Fucking laser printer has started packing up now. Rollers leaving indents on paper as it exits the machine. So now the question is: do I have to spend £120 on a new one just to get pristine prints? Total shit! I got a writing half marathon prepared today then off to buy food and check out new computer hardware. Looks like I might have to find five hundred quid to get my means of production sorted again. On the brighter side I got my article about Poetry Jam published by Durham University Poetry Society. Really chuffed about that. Tried to do work this evening but ended up just looking for somewhere to get my printer fixed. Samsung website sent me round in circles. Enjoyed listening to TV Smith and eating stollen bread. And chocolate porridge. Need more decent employment soon. 11.02 pm.

Tuesday 5th March 2019

Great day. Up early, bags packed, out on the bus. Popped into library to confirm Friday workshop. Read the start of Lucas by Kevin Brooks on the bus to Durham. Half marathon set up in five minutes. Great lunchtime chat with Waddy staff about computers; working in schools; buses versus trains; cars versus buses and trains. Half marathon went well. Wrote seven drafts. Pleased with them. Good turns from the writing group. Looked for computer joy in Durham shops but to no avail. Checked out music books in Waterstones.  Viv Albertine, Brett Anderson, Neil Tenant, etc. Long bus journey via Stanley back home. Read more Lucas on the bus. Ordered a new android tablet. Same model as previous. Four years was a canny innings. Better the devil you know and all that. Still need a new printer to make books. And a new desktop PC in the summer. Read a review of Don Paterson’s ‘The Poem’ exhaustive 700 page theory tome. Listened to Michael Monroe. 10.55 pm.

Wednesday 6th March 2019

Hard day. Took a while to get motivated. Tablet only lasts half an hour on full charge. New one should be here on Saturday. Got a fucking nasty electricity bill. Read a good Wayne Hussey interview. Worked at the desktop. Made up some half marathon booklets for Friday. This afternoon was slow. Tried to read. Fell asleep. Perked up at four to work on the big list. Invoice, reprints of damaged Anomalies pages. Sorted sheets for cover. This evening I did one of my favourite Steve Achieves so far. Word from repair shop is fixing my laser printer would cost as much as buying a new one. Watched a couple of Samuel Beckett videos. Did notebook copy-ups. Splitting headache. Need to be in bed as soon as possible coz I feel shit. Far rather tonight than tomorrow. Need to be fit for the Poetry Jam tomorrow and Friday session. 10.40 pm.

Thursday 7th March 2019

Another dodgy day. Mainly due to the screwed body clock. Tired during the day and lively at night. Was in town this morning for food and banking transactions. The whole day on that and Poetry Jam. I read a bit of Lucas on the bus to Waddy. Then into the computer suite and nice to use a desktop PC that actually works at a reasonable speed. Turn out at Poetry Jam was initially quite satisfactory, but some people left early and only a dozen remaining when Scott Tyrrell got up to read. Alan Gillett and Rose Drew were good. Some canny open mic as well. But not many people. Initially was going to do some new poems tonight but felt they weren’t ready. I read Lessons from the Voice of Experience and Fuck Hotels… I bought Scott’s book HONEST and two copies of his poetry map. Helen Steadman, author of ‘Widdershins’, very kindly gifted me a signed pre-publication copy of her new novel Sunwise. Thanks to Waddy for venue and Fergus for setting up the room. Can’t say I’m not disappointed that we didn’t have similar numbers to last month. Maybe just bad weather, I don’t know. Anyway, the usual Question Time shite when I got home. 11.36 pm.

Friday 8th March 2019

Stopped on the main road out of Moorside at half nine to make notes about Poetry Jam. Pleased I did coz they ended up online tonight. Did a half marathon this morning with Consett Writers in the library. Mostly different prompts from those of Tuesday at Waddy. Different group, different dynamic. We sat in Wetherspoons for a while afterwards. Then I banked some cash and walked in the cold wind back home. Too tired for much. Fell asleep on the couch. Had fish fingers and grilled potato slices for tea – but not until after seven. Watched ‘Girls Will Be Girls’ punk documentary online to save me sitting up till half twelve for the broadcast repeat on BBC4. Watched some Pistols stuff, posted a few things online. Jam pix will go up tomorrow. Hope the new android tablet arrives okay. 11.02 pm.

Saturday 9th March 2019

STEVE ACHIEVES #68

Applied proper Cherry Blossom to the toes

Of my steel-capped doc marten 7-holers

For the first time since purchase two years ago

Removed sticky gunk from the strangely sellotape-bound case

Of my 26 yr old TDK Nirvana In Utero and Nevermind tape

Inserted the stray pirate and returned to the music tower

Finally got the green slow cooker Jenni used

At Christmas for mulled wine back in the cupboard

Without the TV guides and flattened pizza boxes

Tumbling out onto the kitchen carpet

Put pig fat in tissue - and bleach - down the toilet

On this lovely Saturday night waiting

For the battery to fully charge so I could

Upload my list using the new Android tablet

Sunday 10th March 2019

Seriously need to give broadband provider a kick up the arse coz a brand new android tablet should not be slow, cutting out, freezing up and just generally being a pain in the neck. Read some great Tony Williams flash fictions and good pieces by Shelley Day. Typed up writing marathon stuff from last week. Got a poem out of it that I quite like. 11.10 pm.

Monday 11th March 2019

Started well with notes on workshops, looked at some of my own flash from Anomalies then switched to feedback on students’ writing; out this afternoon for a walk into town, wrote a bit on the way back. Had a little hissy fit about workload to pay ratio but I’m in a privileged position and shouldn’t complain. Had a chuckle at today’s front pages on the Brexit state of play – will they really give May the boot if her deal is rejected again? Do they really expect to succeed? Is it orchestrated to fail? Too soft for Brexiteers? Not good enough for Labour? No-one it seems is going to accept No Deal. So, is it May or is it Stay? Maybe it’s why they put a Remainer at the helm… Trimmed ear hair, ate fried egg sandwich, drank hot chocolate. 10.50 pm.

Tuesday 12th March 2019

Fuck’s sake! Some meaty smell on the bus is really off-putting. Today was okay. Got through the lesson this afternoon but content was patchy. Always tricky road-testing new exercises at Waddy. We did lots of fiction-based stuff but they weren’t struck on some of what we read as examples. I read a bit more of Lucas by Kevin Brooks on buses to and from Durham. Fell asleep before reaching Gateshead. Went to Tesco for food and pens. No indelible gel pens. Tried Bensham wifi but new tablet is a total pile of shit. Even Jenni says she couldn’t hack using it. Turns out my original Acer had twice as much capacity all round. No wonder the new one feels like a fucking toy. I’ve wiped the memory and will be sending it back tomorrow. I need decent equipment. I will aim for better this weekend. Now on the half ten bus back to Consett. Big sleep required. 10.40 pm.

Wednesday 13th March 2019

Today has been shit again. Seem to be unable to motivate myself before midday without a lot of swearing and stomping. Got pages glued and sewn up for a copy of Anomalies this afternoon. Looked for a new android tablet. Sent the old one back and have, amazingly, since half twelve had a refund issued. Kind of pulled my left shoulder somehow. Feeling a bit sluggish and failed to get a new blog post up. Facebook will not let me like, comment on, or upload posts. Unable to publish today’s Steve Achieves. I listened to a bit of Black Sabbath, Dio and TV Smith. Brexit is a pile of shite. Watching News night and still pigheaded May, after another defeat, is adamant she’s going to bring her shitty deal back again next week. I have another day to get the hardback book finished. Need to watch the video of my ‘Laughter’ launch set and try to perk up a bit. 10. 48 pm.

Thursday 14th March 2019

Much better day! Chuffed to get some story theory and ideas down on paper this morning. Pleased to get tomorrow’s workshop sorted by lunchtime. Made the dust jacket for a copy of Anomalies. Then case-bound the text-block, using dark denim. The book is being pressed between bamboo boards till Saturday when the jacket will be folded, fitted and trimmed. Juli Watson was in touch, reminding me about Lydia Lunch’s gig in Newcastle tonight. But as Lydia will be singing song’s by Suicide and not her own I wasn’t keen. I don’t know the songs. Feel a bit bad not going, considering I frequently rave about Lydia Lunch and she’s made the effort to pay the region a visit. If it was one of her spoken word shows I would have snapped up a ticket weeks ago. Shaved and prepped for workshop. Listened to Michael Monroe, read a Bukowski story. Fell asleep. Furious that May is getting another chance to put forward her dodgy Brexit deal. Sick of it altogether. 10.40 pm.

Friday 15th March 2019

Re-run of the workshop that I did earlier in the week and it went much better today. Consett Writers enjoyed the stories and exercises. Nice look at some flash fiction, also yardsticks to measure your own writing progress. Word counts for novels. Titles and their importance. Then a great little beginning-middle-end plot generator. Went along to Wetherspoons afterwards for a drink then out to get supplies. Home mid afternoon, looked at emails. Watched my launch set video from January. Made fresh notes for links and intros in preparation for Monday at Gateshead Library. I will enjoy that. Did another Steve Achieves – a bit long-winded, but pleased with response to the previous one. Got some cheap gel pens but they aren’t as indelible as my favourites. Really tired. Still haven’t got the blog up. 10.51 pm.

Saturday 16th March 2019

Busy day punctuated by snacks, book browsing and the possibility of a new bike frame – a 16-inch alloy for trick and casual urban riding. Packed for a few days in Gateshead. Shoulders feel knackered; book stock for Monday’s poetry gig weighs a ton. Then there’s clothes, odds and sods – bit of food and old android tablet to do Steve Achieves. The buses are shite on Saturday nights. But not the V4 I rode to Bridgehill and back to pass the time between initial arrival in Consett at seven and final departure some fifty minutes later. I could have walked to Consett if I didn’t have so much clobber. I might write a bit more in Gateshead but for now I’d like to read a few pages of Lucas. 

7.43 pm.

Sunday 17th March 2019

Awake early to do morning pages then read a bit more of Lucas. Chatted with Jenni. Watched Diagnosis Murder. Talked about Brexit for a while. Had chips and curry sauce. Went out for more supplies. Got some of my favourite retractable gel pens, checked out the mainstream front pages. Deal looks likely to fail again. Got some strawberries, fruit pastries, watched Musicals All Stars. Aiming to stay awake for Hansel and Gretel at twenty past eleven. 10.38pm.