Happy Birthday!

Monday 22nd January 2018

Tentatively making way through admin chores of the day, self-doubt all the way. Lunchtime before things click into place; the lesson plan comes into shape and I feel fine again. Good to retrace steps through some therapeutic journal techniques. Then an hour of typesetting. Spent a while at teatime reading through hatchet job on work of young female performance poets. In particular a character assassination of Hollie McNish. Page poetry versus spoken word taken to new levels of nasty. I remember some small press reviewers in the mid nineties could be really brutal. Enough to make anyone reluctant to send books for review. What the fuck, man. Take Leonard Cohen's approach: if you don't like someone's art, that's perfectly fine – but don't mouth off about it and be an utter shit in the process. Bitter cold. Chuffed to get the big chicken dinner. Pleased to be out all day tomorrow. 10.46 pm.

Tuesday 23rd January 2018

Early into Waddy. Place pretty empty – staff on training and holiday so I sat in reception office answering the phone. Got Blue Notebook 2017 photocopied as back-up. Felt a bit wrecked on bus to Newcastle. But superb night at Squeak-Easy charity event. Fantastic audience. Very appreciative of performances by me, Jenni and Kirsten Luckins. Richard Boggie hosted and did some killer poems, particularly disability toe-tag and erotic bakewell tart. Excellent! Well stuffed with pizza. Four slices. Three before my second set and one straight after. Great first gig of the year. Kind of got the mojo back. That article about Hollie McNish is doing the rounds and Write Out Loud have picked up on it. The Gaurdian too. Of course this will give exposure to the critic, but will she get to do theatre tours with her poems? Anyway, I left the gig tonight around ten o'clock. Got back to Eldon Square a bit early so a wander in the unusually warm night air. Probably midnight before I'm home. OK. 10.24 pm.

Wednesday 24th January 2018

Well if it was eight or nine degrees today then my fucking circulation had stopped working. Didn't get up till after half nine. Read all of Scott Tyrrell's ‘Grown Up’ and enjoyed it. Read more on the Watt/McNish situation. Fuck high brow/low brow. Fuck page/stage rivalry. Really can't tolerate that shit anymore… 

Mark E Smith of The Fall died today. Not a band I knew much about. Lots of opportunities to check out their stuff but never did. Heard he could be a difficult guy and prone to playing badly live, so I never invested any time in checking the band out. People raved about him though. And I do love the quote in response to ever changing line-up: ‘If it's me and yer granny on bongos, it's The Fall’. Workshop stuff sorted this evening. Think I'll be away at Jen’s place till next Tuesday. 11.02 pm.

Thursday 25th January 2018

Woke about six but lay awake a good while till the heating kicked in then did morning pages. Got lots of nice birthday messages on Facebook. Went into town for cakes and cash, then bus to Jen's – which was surprisingly full for Thursday lunchtime. Watched a bit of telly. Jen got me a copy of the new adaptation of Stephen King's IT on DVD; the second ‘Dead Funny’ short story anthology; some number and letter printing blocks; Toffifees; a roll of notepaper from Tiger – so I can try Jack Kerouac approach automatic poem typed on a continuous single piece of paper; and a ticket for the Great Northern Slam in April. Food at The Goose in Percy Street. Loads of meat on my plate. Jenni had a veggie special, then curry and chips for seconds. Bus over to Durham was okay, then onto Coxhoe. Gong Fu Poets was mint. Opener Diane Cockburn read water poems and used octopus dress and bubble wrap as props. Jess Johnson on fire with some hardcore monologues and poems – gets more like a northeast Lydia Lunch every time I see her. Toria Garbutt also very strong with autobiographical pieces about drug culture and childbirth in deprived Yorkshire. Kate Fox headlined this full-on Northern Powerhouse. Her Apocalypse poem is really funny. Some cool open floor spots – good to see David Roe, Megan Pattie, and Scott Tyrrell amongst those road-testing new stuff. Nice chat with Barbara-Ann Whiting and Carol Hutchinson from my writing group. Rowan McCabe in the audience as well. Lift back with James and Maureen Oates – many thanks! 11.35 pm.

Friday 26th January 2018

Nice lie in at Jen's place. Watched a couple of episodes of Frasier then had soup. Bit of a bugger trying to key in stuff on the tablet this afternoon. But it's happening. Not happy yet with the 150 little pieces copied up but will keep editing till I have a book-length selection. Out this afternoon for food supplies. Still riding on the back of my birthday so got some cheeky lemon doughnuts and ate the rest of the carrot cake. Me and Jen talked about jobs. Not sure how I'll make money if workshops dry up. Good to see some classic acts on the BBC4 music programmes tonight: The Who, Jethro Tull, The Stones, Leonard Cohen… Then a selection of Glastonbury golden oldies: Willie Nelson, James Brown, Shirley Bassey, Tom Jones, Kenny Rogers, Dolly Parton, BB King… Good lazy evening. Hope I can pull more poems together this year. 11.05 pm.

Saturday 27th January 2018

Up early and out to Gateshead for stationary supplies. And new toothbrush; got a silver and black one so it doesn't get mixed in with pastel shades and whites of the Bensham bathroom massive. Watched Anne Frank diary, but fell asleep a bit. Read an article about travel writer Dervla Murphy. New TV music talent show very disappointing. But enjoyed The Voice then chips for supper. Easily pleased with comfort food. ‘Would I Lie to You?’ and hot chocolate. 10.54 pm.

Sunday 28th January 2018

Morning pages at five then a few more hours sleep. Been sucked into murder storyline of Corrie since Christmas so now watch weekend omnibus with Jenni. Also Columbo and Diagnosis Murder. Then a walk into Saltwell Park . Nice to be out under the lilac sky. Lush veggie burger for tea. Watched The Devil's Business again and read lots of contemporary poetry. 10.51 pm.