FEBRUARY (PART TWO)

Monday 17th February 2020

Alan and Lorraine of Consett Writers were happy with their standard copies of Anomalies this afternoon. Good to see the huge turn out for their writing group. Tonight, I was just too knackered to do much of anything. I printed an academic study of perzine culture as a booklet and read it cover to cover. Jenni messaged to remind me about the twenty minutes max slot for Arch Remarks. I’ll fill that, no sweat. Bedtime. 11.45 pm.

Tuesday 18th February 2020

Pleased to get the Poetry Jam event page done. Changed the typeface to make it easier on the eye. I’m writing this whilst listening to Jessie Lynn McMain’s livestreaming on YouTube to launch her new book The Loneliest Show on Earth. It seems appropriate for the readings to be done at home. I sent questions which she answered live – talked about being fastidious when it comes to zine-making; and ghosts as metaphors not just supernatural in composition. This afternoon I posted Anomalies pix online. Did the book blurb for my website. Tweaked it a few times. Tonight, I pulled some poems from the GloPoWriMo file for Arch Remarks. Added some ‘Fragments from the Inside of my Smile’. I am listening to the wind, feeling the cold in my bones; way behind and needing to get lots done tomorrow. 12.01 am.

Wednesday 19th February 2020

Computer being a twat again. It’s half term, the weather is crap, everyone will be using broadband, so the internet is shit-slow. Got the poster done for Citizen’s House workshop. Jenni helped me out with a j-peg coz my PDF converter just made everything grey turn black. But Teresa at the venue preferred my green version. Jessie Lynn McMains got in touch to say she is sending me a copy of her new book. I will send her copies of mine to the same cost. This evening I added two poems to the Arch Remarks set and hope to get the whole thing down to under twenty minutes. I made a little sixteen-page pamphlet of it. Haven’t decided if it will be on sale at the gig but hopefully, yes. I just spotted a Buzzcocks box set called Sell You Everything soon to be released by Cherry Red Records. Reading the info about B-sides, demos and outtakes, etc, I just think: Aye, it was a good move doing the Deluxe book. Need big sleep tonight. 11.52 pm.

Thursday 20th February 2020

Big thanks to Jenni for helping me to unlock the ‘write protection’ on my computer via messenger at one o’clock till nearly three this morning. Only six hours sleep. Tried to work but struggling. Stomach pains at present. Been listening to Bad Pollyanna and Buzzcocks whilst typing up stuff. Tried to read earlier but fell asleep. Did loads of Anomalies stuff today. 11.05 pm.

Friday 21st February 2020

Today has been a tough one. Two separate posts on Facebook about suicide. Two people from Waddington Street Centre. Been feeling a bit exhausted the last couple of days. Got my little booklet tweaked. I rehearsed it this afternoon and did copy edits this evening. Same word count as a six-quid pamphlet. I’m selling mine for £2. I’m aiming to pull myself out of a financial rut but it’s a slow process to clear headspace to do more stuff. Jenni got in touch to correct my previous blog post: she doesn’t just like Anomalies Deluxe, she loves it. Tony Gadd put favourable comments on my post as well, said he wished he’d got Deluxe instead of Standard. I listened to Nirvana and Emilie Autumn on Windows Player while internet was down this afternoon. Then Jarboe’s Anhedoniac album this evening on Spotify. I will be doing pamphlets tomorrow and a Tuesday lesson plan. I will try to read some stuff as well. I have the Deluxe book in my hand. At some point I will have to stop mentioning this book. But then again, what the fuck. Anyway, survived the week. And so, to bed. 

11.46 pm.

Saturday 22nd February 2020

I’m at Jen’s place. I got here about eleven after a food haul up the road. Three buses from my place on the £3.50 evening ticket. On the ride to Metro Centre I read Catherine Graham’s ‘Like A Fish Out Of Batter’ poetry pamphlet from Indigo Dreams. Vivid characters, authentic voices – highly engaging snapshots inspired by LS Lowry’s paintings. I particularly enjoyed The Girl with Bouffant Hair being reprimanded by her mother for Saturday night sartorial inappropriateness. And Ray’s sarcasm towards pen-pushers could be a disgruntled factory worker returning from a day of proper graft in any age. I recognised the non-paternal instincts of the male voice in Shift.

   Earlier I read Killing the Piano by Joe Williams. Some have great punchlines. I like his Hadrian’s Wall piece, taking a swipe at current right-wing politics. And the one about former revolutionaries now working in high finance. And an epic Otley run in full character costumes. Yes, I’m gravitating towards pamphlets at present.

   This morning I knocked up a dozen copies of my Arch Remarks set as a little 16-pager on cream paper with navy-blue endpaper and a pale blue card cover. Thinking of doing similar for all my new feature sets. Doing so will help me focus on the layouts while road-testing vocals onstage and steer me towards material for the next full-length collection. Five or six of these mini books would give me plenty to choose from.

   At home I’m pretty grumpy, the house an extension of my misanthropic side; then I step outside and feel human again: smiling at a poodle in a neighbour’s garden; responding to a bereaved rock fan in the supermarket commenting on an empty drumkit of the recently deceased.

   I am still a bit chesty, in the bronchial sense, at present but feel okay. Still in two coats plus other multiple layers. I took my hat off coz I was overheating but am cooling down quite quickly. I intended to be in bed by midnight but might read or watch telly. 11.35 pm.

Sunday 23rd February 2020

Big lie in today coz me and Jenni were talking till the small hours. I did morning pages about books recently read. I ate lentil and bacon soup, Jen had mushroom. She showed me some Frank Styles art on fence boards outside the Northern Design Centre this afternoon and took photos of me standing between Bela Lugosi and Whitby Abbey. We found Jen’s bank card on the pavement near her new workplace – about two miles from her bedroom where she looked for it ninety minutes earlier. Talked about the way spoken word events have changed in recent years – more events, smaller audiences. We got more supplies for the next couple of days. All-day breakfast sandwich for me. Vegetarian wrap for Jen. Chilli and lime-laced cheese on toasted buns. Cherry pie and custard. Looked on money magpie for new revenue streams. Selling toilet roll tubes and big cuddles – well, maybe. Watched Dancing on Ice. Then some hilarious episodes of The IT crowd. The female character gets off with a keyboard player who snores. One of the guys tries to win a mobile phone and gets trapped inside an amusement arcade cabinet. Back in the office: fake appraisals and translation trouble in abundance. Noel Fielding only made a post-goth courtroom appearance, but still very funny. We’ve drank lots of hot chocolate. And stayed warm in our multi-layers. Looked at zines tonight. And Jen’s Queen (band) limited edition £5 coin. Then Catherine Graham’s pamphlet again. 10.25 pm.

Monday 24th February 2020

Woke to shit weather. Snow right across the region. Public transport off. Lorries jack-knifed. Roads blocked. 160 schools closed. A car overturned at Ebchester. Didn’t bode well for tonight’s Arch Remarks gig. I rehearsed downstairs in the kitchen while Jen slept. Watched some ace episodes of Frasier and a bit of Undercover Boss. Ramsey’s American Kitchen Nightmares was mint – really fucked-up restaurant, no new equipment or refurbishment in decades, failing trade, owner hoarding junk, décor peeling, upholstery stinking, cooked and raw meat going rancid in faulty refrigerators. Gordon tore owners to pieces.

   I ate the remaining All-day breakfast triple sandwich for dinner. The weather picked up mid-afternoon. Watched more Frasier – scratched floor, restaurant sprinklers, Bulldog pranks, pushy agent. Ate Ravioli on toast and more cherry pie with custard.  Another read-through of my Arch Remarks set.

   Gig was sparsely attended but enjoyable. Jenni hosted and treated us to a generous selection of January haiku – Hotel Transylvania, Consett, Blue Monday, seasonal criticism – plus her Peaches poem. Ben (and Friend) did some canny acoustic original songs and Ben did a good cover of Depeche Mode’s Personal Jesus. Hilary Green (aka Jen’s Mam) did great with her first ever feature set - poems about trapdoors, hideaways, the White Queen, the Zodiac Killer, Buddy Holly and Bowie. During first break lots of vegan sausage rolls and carrot cakes were consumed. Olya Bowers did poem called Shameless on Shields Road about a mobile phone conversation; and one about East Berliners unable to cope with capitalism after the fall of the Wall. Ken Brady gave us a Glaswegian street scene, sperm banking, Stephen Fry, some posterior lyrics plus numerous great one-liners. My set went okay. All newish material. Jenni showed people – bar sitters as well as audience – her Anomalies Deluxe book and there was quite a bit of interest. Thanks to Olya for ordering a ‘standard’ version and for buying a pamphlet of tonight’s set. We stayed back a canny while afterwards talking about books, art, accidents and injuries. Thanks to Ken’s brother Richard for a lift back to the attic. 11.30 pm.

Tuesday 25th February 2020

Less than seven hours sleep. Out to Gateshead before Jen woke up. Bought pens, chocolate and soup. Read a bit about Weinstein in the Metro on the bus to Durham. Copied out some bits of assonance, consonance and alliteration from poems for this afternoon’s session. Only three people in. Need a big admin day tomorrow, but tonight I just wanted to have time out after the gig and workshop. Hope I can pull things around a bit this year. I bought more paper, got some book pages and four dust jackets printed. But tonight, I just sorted finances and checked emails. Then had a big pig-out of cheese and pickle sandwiches and watched Henry Rollins’ recent interview from Valentine’s Day on Angry Americans. It was pretty good. Mainly politics. Nothing much I hadn’t heard before except he’s no longer touring in 2020. I’m taking a break from Politics. I don’t know enough to argue. I spent three years trying to get my head round it but, basically, I’m trying not to get wound up this year. I am concentrating on making books and trying to keep my head above water. I have lots to copy up. I aim to work the next four days. Need more cream paper. Need big sleep. Oh well. 11.41 pm.

Wednesday 26th February 2020

Some days you think you’ll get all sorts done. The diary left me cold. Literally freezing at the keyboard. This afternoon Jenni got in touch to discuss a new project she’s considering and asked if I’d be interested in participating. Can't give details yet. Ordered a 4-issue subscription to Scottish print mag Dreich – only a fiver. Surely, that won’t cover  postage, much less the mags. Fingers crossed. I tried to make a list of local libraries and their phone numbers, but the net went down again. This evening I ordered What We Talk About When We Talk About Punk e-book from Jessie Lynn McMains and I love it. Read about fifty pages at the computer. Loads of great stuff about mixtapes, tales of teenage lust, heartbreak, road trips and the impact of key songs on the author’s life. Great introduction for me to the music of punk-brass-jazz-ska ensemble The World/Inferno Friendship Society. Totally awesome. Thanks Jessie. 11.01 pm.

Thursday 27th February 2020

Wanted to buy paper and card supplies but couldn’t find what I was after in my hometown – surprise, surprise. Got food in for the week. Played some Hands Off Gretel songs today. The bass player works at Bristol Rock Centre. Watched her teaching video for Judas Priest’s Breaking the Law. Got some contacts for library workshops today. Haven’t a hope in hell of doing a conventional job, so fingers crossed. Maybe I’ll fair better tomorrow. 11.05 pm.

Friday 28th February 2020

Woke early but knackered so I stayed in bed till ten. Got a phone call from Chester le Street library. Sent them my details for a Meet the Author opportunity. Contacted a bunch of other places, hope to get some feedback. Splashed out Xmas and Birthday money on gig tickets today: Bad Pollyanna at Hygge Space, Huddersfield; Hands Off Gretel at The Cluny 2, Ouseburn; Swans at Boiler Shop, Newcastle. Add to those, Toyah with Hazel O’Connor at Sage Gateshead, which I already had the ticket for; and possibly Jarboe at Kazimier Stockroom in Liverpool. This evening I watched two HOG gigs on YouTube. One was a pro-shot multi-cam album launch set – totally ace. Looking forward to seeing them in May. 11.17 pm.

Saturday 29th February 2020

Been playing a home-compiled CD of Swans that I made just under ten years ago. It’s got superb selections from most of the albums up to My Father Will Guide Me Up A Rope to the Sky. It’s been on five times in a row while I’ve copied up notes. The CD track-listing, I’m sure, is similar to that of a cassette I made in the late nineties/early noughties. I was making it on the big stereo in brother Mark’s room when he still lived with Mam and Ernie in Bishop Auckland. He offered to help and regretted it when six hours later I was still shaping the running order to create the perfect emotional journey. You never do things by halves, our kid. Ha! I thought the cassette was in the CD tower behind me by the dropleaf table but it’s not. I’ve looked all over the house. I have scores of pre-recorded and home-taped cassettes, some from when I was sixteen years old. The Cure at Birmingham NEC 1985, The Cult, Balaam and the Angel, Michelle Shocked, Jane’s Addiction, Codeine, Motorhead, John Lennon, Kirstin Hersh, Hole – but no “OMNIPOTENT. OMNISCIENT. OMNIVEROUS.” Where the fuck did that Swans tape go?